5 Chapter 5: A sheep in Wolf“s clothing?

A Saiyan Reincarnation

I anxiously piloted the space pod up onto Kami's lookout expecting a worst case scenario to happen at any moment I parked it behind the main building of the palace luckily that tubby bastard Mr.Popo didn't try anything funny. I let out a sigh of relief and stashed a few senzu beans I was getting ready to depart but first I needed to manage my resources and go over what to do next I was still upset that my Arm Blaster and Scouter were destroyed in one day, two valuable assets both taken by the same tyrant! Even tho it had been years I could not let go of my grudge and anger towards him, it only intensified over time. I suspected that this was a side effect of being a Saiyan given that the Super Saiyan form is derived from strong emotions, not counting that infamous "Tingly feeling on my back" moment in Super I wonder how much it would take for me to go super saiyan?

I couldn't think of any shortcuts to becoming a super saiyan but I was kinda banking on the hope that if my hatred of Mr.Popo kept growing I would eventually transform out of pure spite and malice. Their was not anyone in this world who was truly emotionally significant to me sure I might cry if I ever saw Goku, Vegeta or any of the main cast die but in the end that's just my Fan Boner talking. I still had five Saibamen left and a shit load of Senzu beans that reminds me I should probably go apologize to Korin for waterboarding him for three hours…

Nah i'm sure he'll get over it, I bounced the Saibamen seeds up in down on my palm these guys would only peak with a power level between 500-600 I was not sure on what my exact power level was because my scouter was gone but I should be equal to or atleast near them in terms of power level by now. I was pretty confident in my fighting ability now but I still couldn't fly or shoot lasers and my ki sense was still new to me so it only had a short range unless the life force was really abundant I would not be able to detect anything from far away. That was my top priority I needed to learn how to use my ki or else I won't be able to do shit!

When I had gotten out of my space pod I felt like I was forgetting something… Something really, really important but for some reason this wave of doubt struck me when I looked at my space pod. What was I forgetting? I was really bothered by my apparent memory loss I was forgetting things I had memorised by heart recently and I was never a forgetful person to begin with.although my Saiyan biology had affected my personality, memories are tied to the brain and when I reincarnated I still had the memories of my previous life so even if my they were in a new brain the should not have been affected right? But everything after the Truck crash was a blank I felt like there was a blank space in between my memory of dying and being reborn. Fuck! I don't remember shit. Space Pod, Space Pod, Space Pod I began reciting the target of interest in my head over and over again to hopefully jog my memory. Space Pod, Space Pod, Space Pod I was too busy thinking when Kami showed up.

Kami : "Young one, what is that you are doing? I could sense that you had left yesterday but I could not understand you actions for dropping into the ocean?"

GODDAMMIT OLD MAN!! I lost my train of thought! Wait does he not know that Mr.Popo is a sadistic asshole? Judging from what happened yesterday it appears he's hiding it from him… But why? Pfft, sense a great evil My Ass! You've been living with one for the past Three Hundred Years! And he thinks im Evil?! Stupid Senile Old Slug! Go Fuck Yourself! I screamed at him internally still maintaining a calm and fake smile around him. I really needed him to train me until I could master ki.

Vocado: "Meh Nothing special , Just felt like going for a late night swim anyways I learned how to sense Ki any advice?"

Kami looked at me strangely judging from his reaction he didn't believe me Mr.Popo didn't tell him. Something is definitely wrong here what is that fiend! Planning!? I pointed my finger at a direction in the palace where Mr.Popo was and told him Mr.Popo was there. He seemed surprised at first and convinced that I was telling the truth but he also seemed bothered by this development. For the first time since I got here he asked for my name. I asked him about ki sensing again hoping to attain a bit of wisdom to improve my ki sensing ability.

Kami : "Vocado is it, hmmm I am unsure as to why or how you managed to develop ki sensing as for advice I cannot teach you in good faith without having a pure heart."

He poked at my chest where my heart was with his gnarled wooden staff. This again come on when is this Old Asshole gonna train me?

Vocado : "If I were to remove this supposed evil side of me would it not develop into its own evil entity like King Piccolo?"

Kami : "What! Who told you that!?"

Aww shit. I said too much, maybe I can smooth talk my way out of this.

Vocado : "Is he not I mean he's the only other Namekian on Earth and you guys look and sound identical it was either that or he was your evil twin brother."

Kami : "...."

Vocado : "And if you can remove the evil from yourself why don't you do it for me! I have to hurry up and get stronger so I can stop Frieza and save my planet! The more time we waste the more innocent people suffer!"

Kami let out a sigh he seemed to understand my motivations but was still hesitant. Damn! I knew I should have taken acting in High School, It doesn't look like this Old Bastard will be persuaded so easily.

Kami : "Vocado although I can tell from your words and from reading your mind that your heart is in the right place, the fact remains your heart is still tainted by evil and as Guardian of the Earth I cannot in full confidence train you until your heart is pure."

Uuuugh i'm getting so sick of pure of heart that and, pure of heart this, what even is a pure heart! Goku was a deadbeat dad, who put the entire Earth in danger countless time's like when he gave Cell that senzu bean or that time he spared Frieza even giving that genocidal space racist some power to survive and continue living despite fully knowing what kinda person Frieza was, or what about that time he put entire universes at stake by provoking Zeno into starting the universal tournament just to get off on having a fight and He is pure of heart!? What's worse the fucking Saibamen are considered pure of heart in this continuity and im Not!? Bullshit!! I need to find an alternative I would ask Mr.Popo but the last time I did he ripped off my tail, think! think! Think! My answer came in the form of Videl! How did she learn how to fly by Gohan training her if I mimic their training would it work? No it would not, this entity inside my body still feels completely foreign to me I have not yet adapted to the concept of ki.

Kami still seemed troubled that I knew about King piccolo being his evil counterpart not buying my excuse he began getting suspicious and used his telepathic communication to see what I was thinking, as soon as I noticed him enter my mind and forcefully search around! I scrambled my thoughts and memories hoping to hide my true intentions I played dumb on the outside pretending to not notice what he was doing.

He was searching my mind and what he saw shocked him they were the hardships I faced inside the hyperbolic time chamber my climbing of Korin's tower and my thoughts in attempting to land on Earth on his lookout, experiencing the same hardships and reading through my ramblings of Mr.Popo and the inhumane treatment i was put through and all the misfortune I experienced when I arrived on Earth. He stopped andI I could feel a sense of pity coming from him. If I hadn't acted any sooner I would have been in big trouble of getting my secret exposed luckily he didn't find out my true intentions or what I had done to Korin. When the telepathic communication ended my mind had entered a state of overtime to come up with a plan as this was the most ideal time to convince him to train me. He was still shocked at learning the true nature of Mr. Popo and his pity for me will help me guilt trip him into training me.

Vocado : "Mr Kami if you will not train me then at least teach me how to use the MAFUBA Mr.Popo had told me about this move if can use this, I can stop King Piccolo! Before I leave since you will not train me I must go stop Frieza on my own afterwards."

Kami seemed surprised at my response. I needed to play the tragic hero I would slowly butter up that old greasy bastard until he trained me, I would get him to stop me from leaving the planet to go against Frieza and agree to train me after I had sealed King Piccolo. Kami may still be a dick in this point of the story, but he is still a good person and will learn to eventually trust me like he did with Goku after this.

Kami agreed to my proposal and said that he would teach me himself but first he would have a talk with Mr.Popo first He had a very sad expression on his face when he said that last part. I had managed to dodge a bullet but only to run into another one. Shit! Mr. Popo is definitely not gonna take this well and knowing that i'm the only person Kami could have learned his secret from he would undoubtedly take action against me. I felt fear begin to spread in my body I was unsure if Mr.Popo would make an attempt on my life because of this. I walked over to the trees and plants of Kami's lookout and planted all five Saibamen there as a Fail Safe if things went wrong. I wouldn't grow them until I had to but this will save me not only preparation time but also prevent him from discovering how the Saibamen work. To him it will just look like five Little Green's had popped out randomly from the tree's of Kami's lookout.

I didn't want to be here when Kami confronted Mr.Popo I was walked back to my pod and was getting ready to leave, who knows how that freak will react I decided it was best if I get on my space pod and left the lookout to go explore the Earth. When suddenly I felt a strong Life Force appear behind me my ki sense went nuts and I nearly stumbled back at how sudden it was to have such a life force explode behind me, turning back I saw Mr.Popo standing their with his usual smile.

Vocado : "Aww Shit…"

Mr: Popo : " Maggot do you remember the Pecking Order?"

I already knew that replying meant getting hit again so I nodded my head nervously despite my training. The difference in power and speed between us was too vast to overcome, thanks to the training in the hyperbolic time chamber I could handle him in close combat when it came to defending against him but I could only hold out for a few minutes before i'd get turned into a human punching bag. He seemed normal but then again this guy had no real middle ground for being normal to begin with.

Mr. Popo : "That's funny because Mr.Popo remembers telling you not touch Mr.Popo's food."

Food? What the hell is he on about all i've eaten these past years were senzu beans and the healing splooge.

Mr. Popo : " listen up Maggot, Mr.Popo's is about to remind you of the pecking order"

Mr. Popo : "it goes You"

Mr. Popo : "The Dirt"

Mr. Popo : "The worms inside of the Dirt"

Mr. Popo : "Mr. Popo's Stool!"

Mr. Popo : "Kami"

Mr. Popo : "Then Mr. Popo."

Mr.Popo : "Any questions?"

Vocado : "Um Yeah Wh… (*BAM), Blargh!"

Goddammit! He kicked me in the dick! I couldn't even scream that was a low blow even for him my balls were crushed! I started puking. Aww damn I kinda walked into that one didn't I ? I wanted to ask about the Food what Food!? I began tearing up I crawled into the fetal position my voice was high pitched as I squeaked out.

Vocado : 'W-h-a-t F-o-o-d…"

Mr.Popo : "Those seeds you planted in the garden. They were in my food Maggot."

I stared at him dumbstruck he ate my Saibamen! I didn't know wether to laugh or cry, I ate a senzu bean got up and wiped my tears away. I was going to say something else when he spat "ptew" the seeds back on my face I closed my eyes as the saliva covered seeds slowly slid down my face.


I lost control of my saiyan urges and charged at him swinging my fist but instead of blocking my attacks he grabbed my arm and threw me off the Lookout.

Mr.Popo : "Ta Ta."

Vocado: "Yargh! You Mother Fucker!!!"

I said as I flew down I was so pissed off right now that I was seething with anger but I had a bigger problem right now as I fell high above the sky I could not think of a way to get out this scenario. Yelling for help was pointless since no one would come I started shouting out profanities that would make a sailor blush as I was in free fall trying to come up with a way to get out of this scenario.

My only answer was to fly. Fly or Die shit! Okay, Okay let's concentrate here I closed my eyes and tried my best ignore my rage. Right now. But it was all I could feel, angry for three whole years I had held a grudge against Mr.Popo It was too long to hold onto a grudge even against someone like Mr.Popo it had already festered deep within my heart I was unable to do anything about it, but endure the abuse I truly hated Mr. Popo with every fiber of my being. He was the only thing on my mind how long can a person endure, how long can a person stay sain, how long until that person snaps completely beyond the point of no return from all this pent up hatred?

I was at my mental capacity long before today for a split second my hair and eyes had flashed an iconic color and during that split second I felt the foreign entity inside my body shrink and then explode it had expanded encompassing not only my entire body but the area of space around me in a golden flashing light before returning to my body and vanishing.

This is it! My chance I concentrated the foreign entity which now felt like apart of my own body and focused it into the center of my body as best I could directing it until I could feel a pull the more I pushed the more I could feel a pull against the foreign entity that was encompassing my body until my free fall turned into a float I was still falling but it was much slower almost gently even but I felt tired really tired as sweat began to pour. The more I thought about my situation, the more perplexed I was specifically on the topic of Mr.Popo.

How did Mr.Popo know about my ki sense? Kami did not know and he's the Guardian of the Earth and I never told him but he already knew about it. Mr.Popo was an Asshole among Assholes sure but I couldn't help but feel his actions just now were intentional I knew full well that he was a psychopathic Sadist but if he's the Sadist I know and Hate! why did he throw me out of the lookout instead of pulverise me, that's going way too easy on me, despite him having committed an act of what most would deem evil it was really tame and from my experience can be considered being gentle when compared to some of the shit he's done before. Everything felt to convenient to be a coincidence especially my ki sensing development. Did he know I would fly or develop my ki sense?

My anger was being clouded with doubt I couldn't help but feel that in his own special brand of twisted grotesque diabolical fucking way he really did care for me as a student. In my previous life I was raised on the idea of Tough Love, on the idea that we are the hardest on those we want to succeed the most…

No Fuck That ! Snap out of it ! That Guy is a Deranged Lunatic what the hell am I thinking! I shook out of my weird doubts but the anger and grudge that I was holding onto was now a bag of mixed emotions. I couldn't tell if his ulterior motives were to actually help me or if he had none whatsoever and simply enjoyed fucking with me for the sake of some sick joke. And without rhyme or reason suddenly Mr.Popo had appeared beside me riding his Magic carpet smiling his usual smile. Well, well, well Speak of the Fucking Devil Himself! I was ready cuss this Asshole out a new one when that feeling of doubt crept back in I hesitated.

Vocado : "Hey As-s um… Mr.Popo."

Mr. Popo : "Well Maggot how was it?"

Vocado : "...."

Mr. Popo : "Hmm I'll be waiting for you above Maggot."

He disappeared that's it? No verbal abuse, or Assault? I had trouble trying to understand his actions just a little while ago he was a totally different person in my mind but now.. I don't know The Mr.Popo of this continuity was very reminiscent of the T.F.S version almost identical, but in a lot of small ways different. I had improved so much in such a short amount of time because of him if he hadn't trained me the way he did in the hyperbolic time chamber I would not have been this adept at close combat in such a short amount of time he turned someone who had never learned to fight into a martial arts master in only three years I might not have even awakened to my ki sensing ability if it was not for him. he spent an entire three years straight with me inside the room of spirit of time twenty four hours a day training me every second of every day was that dedication or sadism would someone really go that far for someone they were simply getting there fill off sadism for? Or maybe he was doing both The more I thought about it the more confused, I became so caught up on this I almost forgot the most important part of this experience I felt it. For a split second I could feel that gloriously incandescent energy shroud my body I hadn't transformed but I had tapped into the source of power known as Super Saiyan. When I finally landed I was going to take another senzu bean to heal up and fly up when I noticed my Senzu Beans were missing!

(Meanwhile at the Lookout)

Mr.Popo was standing by the ledge of the lookout holding a stash of Senzu beans in hand playfully tossing them around giggling to himself. While Kami stood behind him.

Mr. Popo : "Enjoy your rest Maggot."

Kami : " Mr.Popo we need to talk…"